Wednesday, January 26, 2011

My Olivia

I was talking to a friend today and called my little Avery, Olivia. 

 I know she probably doesn't get this sense from me, but I consider her, mine, in a way.  I know she is not, there are so many others that lay claim over her far ahead of me.  She is a daughter.  She is my brother's wife.  She has many friends.  My mother loves her as her own.  But, I think of her often especially as she is about to enter my world.  Where did I read recently that having children is like dying and being reborn.  I think it was a fluff piece in Time Magazine over breakfast this morning.  But, there is nothing fluffy about childbirth or the after-rearing for that matter.  There is something about having children that changes you forever and ever.  It is like dying, and there is a rebirth.  

I took this photo of her in what will soon feel like moments before her firstborn's birth, though she is still, this very moment pregnant.  Three days overdue.  Overdue: that time that stands still and yet cannot rest.

I have three sisters and they have, between them, birthed 9 children and I have not been there for a single one of those births.  To my credit I was pushing out my own four during most of those years.  But, now I am here and can "be there" for this birth.  I can come with flowers and felicitations, unsolicited advice, and offers to babysit and hopefully, another mother face to cry at, when the time so calls for such a thing.

I love you Olivia and wait with baited breath for you to be birthed into my world.


k a t y said...

We all anxiously await, but do so gladly to let this baby boy enter the world when he is nice and golden brown.

Ann said...

I'm crying. Not sure exactly why. I'm thrilled for Olivia and anxious, too. Oh the woes and thrills of being a mother!

buddens said...

Good luck to her! I hope it all goes well.

I was browsing posters for myself and happened upon this gem that made me think of your chickens and their fresh eggs.

Rebecca said...

Aren't we blessed to all claim Olivia? Jordan, so beautiful put, as usual! Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

olivia said...

"i am flattered" is only the very root expression of what i feel.

i am so honored to be considered yours! i admire you more than you know and am excited for my birth into your world. it's almost as if i can sense this certain upcoming "death" as well. i'm thrilled that you are here to share it with me. see you on the other side.

love, olivia