I really am in pursuit of "the still". In "the spinning". After church today I found a piece in the solace of Lucy's single bed, under her butterfly comforter I relinquished my wakefulness and fell into sleep. While the rascals whirled in play around me, I had vivid dreams of dolphins in the surf and riding in a pale green VW Bug with the windows down. I had some hot crispy french fries in hand and my kids were in the car with me. One in the front seat, the other three in the back. Except they were really really tiny. Like about two inches tall each. It was the perfect size. Small enough that I couldn't hear them. Small enough that they couldn't reach each other. Not big enough to eat all my fries.
Today in church Avery was ferociously holding onto my neck rocking me back and forth asking "You okay, Mom?". Hazel kept switching seats and talking loudly which was a problem because Seth had the pew blockaded with his feet propped across the way, which irked Hazel. Avery was sharing her goldfish which ignited a chorus of "give me one!" Lucy kept wanting me to add bows onto her drawing of a princess. I glanced up once wondering what the speaker at the pulpit was trying to tell me but was quickly drawn back to "the spinning" as I tried to hush Hazel's chanting . She bobbed her head from side to side saying the same thing over and over.
"I'll never give up! I'll never give up! I'll never give up! I'll never give up!"