This amazing person made me a mother.
Holy cow, what a ride. I can't quite remember the person I was before he began to grow inside my body. Now he is growing. Growing quickly outside my body in this world. He's learning. Learning quickly. Learning love and pain and intense joy, excitement, distress. Today, for the first time, he on his own accord apologized. With no prompting from me. He said, "I'm sorry." I got on him for mucking up the soap in the shower. He didn't really deserve that.
After having Seth, I've learned the hardest part of motherhood, parenthood in general, is that you see them--these little ones--and you see that they deserve the very very best. So each day, you wake up determined to give them what they deserve and each and every day you fall short. That's hard to take. But, as I learned today, they are so forgiving.
I love you, my first born son. The world is that much more beautiful with your guilelessness, your determination, and your sweet unfiltered love in it. Thank you for your forgiveness. Thank you for who you are.
Shhh, we're holding off the celebrating until we get to "our new house"